Oct 22, 2009

Overall, two types of men a boob known as Gynecomastia and Pseudogynecomastia is affecting some teens today. Whether you are a teen or an adult male, it can be embarrassing as people stare at your like you are some sort of a freak. Gynecomastia sometimes occurs from at the puberty stage and ceases, yet some of the older generation develop man boobs later.

Gynecomastia, when it develops in teens is not necessary related to obesity. After a few years, man boobs often disappear. Teens need to watch their weight very closely to prevent body fat from building up more to help them take control of man boobs.

Experts are not clear on the causes of gynecomastia, yet some indicators from study has shown some proof that the cause could possibly be from imbalances of sex hormones, or else too much estrogen build up. Depending on how the breast tissue responds to the hormones themselves. The appearance resulting from Gynecomastia has an extra tissue and fat around the breastbone. In men, it appears as double chest fat or puffy nipples.

Science has figured that possibly the hormones produced more estrogen and less testosterone. Chronic kidney, liver, and HIV diseases along with some others could be a cause for enlarged breast also. Steroids, food supplements, cancer treatments, spinal cord injury, and marijuana are known to increase estrogen levels.

When man boobs appear it doesn’t necessary cause physical harm, yet the condition may cause soreness around the breast area and tenderness about the nipples. The condition can be treated with certain medications to control the symptoms.

Don’t try to treat Gynecomastia on your own. See your doctor if you think you have gynecomastia. Let your doctor do his job because some medications are known to be the cause and there are some for treating them. For example, radiation treatment for prostate cancer is known for causing enlarge breast.

Surgery is usually recommended as treatment of Gynecomastia. Beware that many insurance companies will not pay for this procedure because it is considered cosmetic surgery.
Exercise is not the answer to decreasing enlarged breast tissue in some cases. More and more men are finding that it is a lost cause to exercise for decreasing this tissue. Therefore, sometimes gynecomastia surgery is the only answer.

The second type of Gynecomastia is the Pseudogynecomastia, known as the fake Gynecomastia.

Pseudogynecomastia is chest fat around the breastbone. Chest fat can be decreased with exercise on a regular basis. When you begin an exercise program; don’t stop after a few days.
In order to see sufficient results a person needs to continue the program as an on going way of life.

When exercising to reduce chest fat plan 4 days a week to exercise. On two of these days, you should work with a low intensity program. Walking and biking are a couple good ways to work out on these days. Plan at least two days to enjoy light resistance workouts, such as weights lifting or resistance machines. Seek support to encourage you with your new program. Having a partner will motivate and give you support to help you stick with your plan to reduce man boobs.

Setting goals for your new program is a great way to keep up your motivation. Make your goals short and long term to keep your goals current at all times. With goals, you’ll be able to see progress as each one is reached.

You’ll find that with goals, an exercise program to lose chest fat will help you sleep better, and your diet will improve to help you lose weight. Teenagers often find it difficult to stick with a plan, but if you are dealing with gynecomastia and teens issue then you must set goals and adhere to a plan.

Oct 14, 2009

The key to being your most beautiful self is learning how to accentuate your natural attributes so that the real you can shine through. Here are three things that you can do to love yourself just the way you are.

1. Be Confident. Projecting an attitude of confidence (not conceit) makes you more alluring and appealing. People will want to get to know you, because you'll come off as a girl who's comfortable in her own skin and who's fun to be around. Even if you feel a bit nervous, do your best to project a positive and upbeat attitude. What will happen eventually is even if you're a bit insecure, by making it a habit to think and act more confidently, in time your inner attitude will catch up with your outer persona.

2. Be Your Own Cheerleader. It's great to have people in your life who lift you up and cheer you on. But, sometimes things won't work out that way and you'll have to become your own cheerleader. How? Talk to yourself as if you were coaching a star athlete. If you were coaching a star athlete, you would not talk down to her nor would you allow negative comments to enter her space. It's sounds corny, but this tip is known to work.

3. Get Physical. Girls who participate in some form of physical activity tend to feel more confident and in control than those who do not. It's not about losing weight or burning yourself out. It's about getting your body moving so that you'll have more energy and drive, not to mention you'll probably meet new friends as well.

4. Make Up Your Mind To Be Productive, No Matter What. Seriously. You've got to decide that no matter what happens in life, how many challenges you face and how you feel on any given day that you are going to be productive. This entails: making your education your #1 priority, setting goals that will get you where you want to go and having positive values that shape the decisions you make.

5. Give The Drama A Break. Everybody thrives off of a little drama, every now and then. But if your life is one big dramatic episode, it might be well worth the effort to drop some of the drama in your life. This includes: boyfriend drama, the drama you give to your parents and the drama that comes with blowing every little thing way out of proportion. If you've be known to put the Capital D in Drama Queen, perhaps it may be time to drop the drama...at least some of it.

6. If Your Life Is Dull or Boring Do Something About It. The quickest way to get a life is to find things that you enjoy doing and develop your interests. If you've always wanted to try your hand at acting, sign up for the drama club at your school. If there's a hidden poet living inside of you, go recite your poetry at an open mike event. Or, publish your own poetry blog. If you've got an opinion that you want to share, comment on other people's blogs. You can comment on this one, if you've got some additional tips to add on how to become the director and producer of your life. The lesson here is, your life does not have to be dull or boring if you find out what interests you. Then, develop your interests.

Oct 13, 2009


You know how wonderful you are, and you know that others know how wonderful you are, but what do you do when admiration crosses over the line into jealousy? For most teens there will come a day when you realize that one of your friends is jealous – whether it be of who you are, what you’ve done or something you have – and that this jealousy is hurting your friendship. When this happens it can seem like there is nothing that you can do, but the good news is that there is. Don’t let jealousy spoil your relationships. Tackle it head on and you might be back to normal much sooner than you think.

Confront Your Friend

It can be hard to walk up to a friend and ask them what the problem is, but if you want to save your friendship you’ll have to do just that. Don’t approach them and ask why they are jealous of you (unless of course you want to appear totally conceited), just take some time alone with them and let them know that you’ve been feeling like there’s something been coming between you. If they refuse to respond, then use the opportunity to explain how you have been feeling. Chances are that something you say will strike a nerve and your friend will open up as well.

Hammer Out a Solution

When you figure out what is irking your friend, ask him or her what (s)he thinks would make the situation better. If, for example, (s)he say that (s)he feels like (s)he doesn’t get to spend any time with you because your off with your new friends from the swim team then maybe you could invite her along the next time or block off one day a week for just the two of you. Remember, though, that whatever solution you decide on should be a compromise. Don’t limit your own talents or opportunities simply because your friend is unhappy. Try instead to include him or her in your new life and see how that works out.

Practice Your Patience

Even if you do get to the bottom of your friend’s jealousy you’ll likely need to remain patient while (s)he works out his or her own emotions. Even if you can think of a compromise to help get your friendship back on track you can’t do the emotional work of getting over jealousy for your friend. There may be pot-holes in the road up ahead, and you may need to chat with your friend again. If you do, remember to stay calm and ask what is wrong. If it turns out to be the same issue, tell your friend that you feel you have been sticking to the compromise. It may be that your friend is unable to see that, or (s)he didn’t really commit to the compromise and wanted you back all to him or herself. If this is the case then there’s not much you can do about it besides reiterate your offer to meet him or her half-way. 
 
Even the best of friendships can be tinged by jealousy. This destructive emotion is rarely productive and can turn best friends into worst enemies. Before taking drastic action, chat with your jealous friend to see if the two of you can work out a compromise. If you can’t, be prepared to know exactly how far you will go to keep your friend – and how far you won’t.

Oct 12, 2009

If you have ever been looking for diet plans for obese,fat,overweight teenage boys, then you are in luck. Many teenage boys are overweight, even some of the more active ones. From soccer players to basketball,from football players to baseball players, overweight teenage boys can be found doing all sorts of different things. It does not matter what race they are or what types of activities they do or what all they eat for supper. Overweight teenage boys can be found from all walks of life.

Many have a stereotypical idea that all overweight teenage boys indulge in video games for hours upon end and simply do not get the proper exercise that is required in order to help maintain a healthy body weight. Unfortunately, this is not always the case. Even in teenage
boys that participate in active sports, some will find themselves still being overweight. Whether they play tennis, golf, baseball, or chess, these overweight teenage boys are found in each and every niche.

Finding the right diet plans for fat ,overweight teenage boys can be extremely difficult. Even if you find the right exercise plan for the particular teenager, it might simply not be enough. One might try to resort to other methods, such as diet pills, but this is not always the best way to go. Sometimes the answer can be much simpler than to resort to buying diet pills. Sometimes, the answer is as simple as taking a combination of actions in order to help that teenager lose weight.

The first step is to ensure that the teenager is on a good, healthy diet. Remember that teenagers are always growing, and so they need more energy than you might think. This can make it hard to determine just how much is too much, but with time and patience, and a little
luck, you can usually determine what is just right for your specific teenager. Not only should you pay attention to how much is in the diet, but you must also pay attention to what is in the diet. Growing teenagers need a wide variety of nutrients. Vitamin and other weight loss supplements can help to ensure that your teenager is getting all of the vitamins and nutrients he needs, though you cannot depend entirely on them.

After having determined the right diet for your teenager, try to get him on an exercise plan that helps to ensure that he is active. If he is already involved in active sports, then this, combined with his new healthy diet, should help to ensure that your teenager begins to lose weight. It can be truly amazing how much of a difference dieting and exercise when combined can make in a teenage boy’s life, or in the lives of others. He will have more energy and be more confident in himself and his abilities. Diet plans for fat,overweight teenage boys can be the perfect way to motivate your teenager and help him feel good about himself.

Oct 8, 2009

How can we encourage our teens at school without putting them under too much pressure?

Teens are sometimes under a lot of pressure to perform well at school, and this can lead to anxiety and tension.

That's the bad news. The good news is that young people, on the whole, are getting better results year on year.

Year ten (ages 14-15) is seen by many as a watershed. If your teen gets through this year and is still motivated, enthusiastic and working well, she's more than likely to continue doing well.

For others, this is when difficulties and problems emerge.

Switching off

Some teenagers go off specific subjects; others go off school generally. If your child's struggling, you'll need to know exactly what it is she's struggling with.

If the trouble is with specific subjects, it may be she's fallen out with the teacher, is having difficulties with a part of the curriculum, or is just feeling she just can't do it.

Your teen may need help (if you know the subject, that's great; if you don't, there are lots of books available to help you get up to speed), or simply some encouragement.

How to help

If you get on well with your child, talk a lot and still enjoy each other's company, most problems will be relatively easy to overcome.

If, on the other hand, you can't discuss anything contentious without it turning into an argument, you might not be the best person to tackle the problem. Ask for help from someone your child likes and trusts, such as a teacher, relative or neighbour.

This is no time for pride, guilt or torture - the quicker the problem's resolved, the sooner your teenager can get back to her studies and you can stop worrying.

Teenagers who reject school

There are three main reasons why children skip school:

  • Something's going on, such as bullying, that makes them reluctant to attend
  • They're not coping with their subjects or they're not being stretched enough
  • Emotional worries make school seem irrelevant
It's vital to establish the cause and take steps to resolve it before your teen's future is seriously affected.

Exclusion and expulsion

Schools have the right to exclude a young person who's been in serious trouble. In most cases this is for a fixed period, such as three or five days.

The school must always phone parents, then follow up with a letter if a child is to be excluded. Letters should also be sent to the local education authority to explain why the school has enforced the exclusion.

Remember these points:

  • Parents have the right to appeal to the head teacher and governors if they don't think exclusion is fair.
  • A temporarily excluded child isn't allowed on the school premises and should be given school work to do at home.
  • Permanent exclusion - expulsion - is a last resort and is likely to follow a number of fixed exclusions. A discipline committee should meet to discuss the decision. If it agrees to the permanent exclusion, you have 15 days in which to appeal.
Exclusion from school is obviously very serious. Once a teenager is excluded she's more likely to get into further trouble, and this can be difficult to deal with.

Oct 7, 2009

Involvement in academic and athletic extracurricular activities is a big part of your teen's highschool years. It gives them a chance to express them selves by participating in one of the various programs the school or your community offers. It's true that this is an excellent way to help teens make friends with like minded peers while learning valuable social skills. However, the benefits don't stop when they walk across the stage and receive their diploma. Many students will go on to enter the work place or further their education. It is on these places that the skills they learn will give them the edge they need to make their way in an adult world.

  • Team Work: One of the biggest things employers look for in job candidates is their willingness to work as a team. Team work is often emphasized in college and universities classrooms where professors know and therefore teach it's importance in the real world. What can prepare your son or daughter more about team work than actually being part of a team. Being part of a team helps them hone the skills necessary to interact with their peers in a respectful manner.
  • Goals: As a member of a sports team or club, your child will be responsible for meeting individual or group goals. For this reason, extracurricular activities is an excellent way to help your teen learn the fundamentals of goal building, something that is necessary in the work place. Goals help the individual keep site of where they are and where they would like to be.
  • Responsibilities: As an active member of a team or club, individuals are held responsible for things like attendance and participation. When a member doesn't respect their responsibilities they will face consequences much like an adult would in the work place. Failure to be responsible can get you benched or suspended from team activities and in the workplace it could get you fired. Students who learn to take their responsibility seriously will carry that into their careers.
  • Respect for Rules: Sure you may have rules that your son or daughter must follow but it's the outside world that really teaches them the importance of following rules. Rules, much like responsibilities, can make or break a persons career. When rules are not followed on the field it will result in penalties that will effect their play. Likewise, rules in the work place must be followed to make sure the weeks end bring a pay check and not a pink slip.
  • Conflict Resolution: When two or more people work together for a common purpose there are bound to be conflicts. Since each individual sees the world through their own eyes, not everyone will approach problems the same way. This is very true when it comes to extracurricular activities. While one student may feel a particular play is the best option, another student may believe there is a better way to reach the goal. Ultimately, for the team or club to succeed there will have to be a conflict resolution. This is a very important part of work place success and therefore learning it early on can save your teen from problems in the future.
  • Resume Building: Whether it's their college application or a job resume, extracurricular activities along with academic performance will put your teen at an advantage. To employers involvement in these shows the individual was able to balance work and play. In other words, they were able to take on various projects at the same time, something that is very important in the work force.

Involvement in academic and athletic extracurricular activities is a big part of your teen's highschool years. It gives them a chance to express them selves by participating in one of the various programs the school or your community offers. It's true that this is an excellent way to help teens make friends with like minded peers while learning valuable social skills. However, the benefits don't stop when they walk across the stage and receive their diploma. Many students will go on to enter the work place or further their education. It is on these places that the skills they learn will give them the edge they need to make their way in an adult world.

  • Team Work: One of the biggest things employers look for in job candidates is their willingness to work as a team. Team work is often emphasized in college and universities classrooms where professors know and therefore teach it's importance in the real world. What can prepare your son or daughter more about team work than actually being part of a team. Being part of a team helps them hone the skills necessary to interact with their peers in a respectful manner.
  • Goals: As a member of a sports team or club, your child will be responsible for meeting individual or group goals. For this reason, extracurricular activities is an excellent way to help your teen learn the fundamentals of goal building, something that is necessary in the work place. Goals help the individual keep site of where they are and where they would like to be.
  • Responsibilities: As an active member of a team or club, individuals are held responsible for things like attendance and participation. When a member doesn't respect their responsibilities they will face consequences much like an adult would in the work place. Failure to be responsible can get you benched or suspended from team activities and in the workplace it could get you fired. Students who learn to take their responsibility seriously will carry that into their careers.
  • Respect for Rules: Sure you may have rules that your son or daughter must follow but it's the outside world that really teaches them the importance of following rules. Rules, much like responsibilities, can make or break a persons career. When rules are not followed on the field it will result in penalties that will effect their play. Likewise, rules in the work place must be followed to make sure the weeks end bring a pay check and not a pink slip.
  • Conflict Resolution: When two or more people work together for a common purpose there are bound to be conflicts. Since each individual sees the world through their own eyes, not everyone will approach problems the same way. This is very true when it comes to extracurricular activities. While one student may feel a particular play is the best option, another student may believe there is a better way to reach the goal. Ultimately, for the team or club to succeed there will have to be a conflict resolution. This is a very important part of work place success and therefore learning it early on can save your teen from problems in the future.
  • Resume Building: Whether it's their college application or a job resume, extracurricular activities along with academic performance will put your teen at an advantage. To employers involvement in these shows the individual was able to balance work and play. In other words, they were able to take on various projects at the same time, something that is very important in the work force.

Oct 6, 2009

Using drugs is a serious problem and using drugs is not the same as being addicted to drugs. In most cases addiction happens over time and after regular use. Some teens may get addicted faster than others Using any illegal drugs (sometimes called 'designer' drugs) is risky and should be avoided. There is no way of knowing what they actually contain. They may have very dangerous chemicals that can cause damage to the brain or even death and this can happen at first use and before addiction starts.
Don't react immediately! Give yourself time to calm down if you are upset, and to think through what is happening. Strong reactions due to fear are common but they don't help. Don't ridicule or lecture. Getting angry can close the door on communication and may harm your relationship with your teenager.
Don't regard this situation as a family disgrace. Recovery is possible just as it is with other illnesses.
Try to get a picture of what is happening in your child's life. Give your teenager a chance to tell you what happened, for example, 'We'd like you to give us an idea what was going on in your life.'
Find out what kinds of drugs are being used and how they are being used. The best way to find out is to ask your teenager. Discuss with him what he considers to be the benefits and consequences of using drugs. Is he clearly aware of what is likely to happen if he uses drugs, such as the effect on his family relationships, education, and future chances of getting work?
If your teenager is apprehended give him moral support but let him see that it is his responsibility. Let him deal with the consequences of his behavior, including picking up the bill, making arrangements, keeping appointments etc.
Separate the behavior from the person. You may not approve of what your teenager is doing but you still need to show your love and care.
It is important to tell your teenager that you are concerned about his wellbeing and that you will be seeking substance abuse treatment for him.
During recovery, encourage teens to engage in after-school activities with adult supervision. If they cannot participate in sports or other extracurricular school activities, part-time employment or volunteer work can build self-esteem.
Don't expect an immediate, 100-percent recovery. Like any illness, there is a period of convalescence with a brain disorder. There may be relapses and times of tension and resentment among family members.
Do offer love, support, and understanding during treatment and recovery.
BALANCING YOUR VALUES AND YOUR WORDS AS YOU TALK TO YOUR TEEN
Your teenager probably knows, but remind him what your values are and what you will allow in your house. This can be a tricky issue and will depend on how old your teenager is.
With older teenagers you may have to come to terms with the fact that they are making their own life choices. However, if they won't give up the drug you still have the right to say that they are not to use it at home.
Some parents tell their teenagers to give it up or they will have to leave home. If you say this, you need to be sure that it is what you really want and that you mean what you say. By saying this you may be pushing your teenager into a more risky situation.


Oct 5, 2009

It is essential that parents and other individuals that work directly with teenagers know and understand how to properly prevent teenage substance abuse. Abuse of various types of substances such as alcohol, tobacco, marijuana, prescription medications, stimulants, and even certain over-the-counter drugs is quite prevalent among the teenagers of today.

A study conducted on teens to the age of seventeen was conducted and it was found that over one million individuals in this age group have some type of dependence on substances, and another million are said to have an inclination towards addiction involving alcohol. These statistics are staggering! In this guide, you will learn how to properly prevent teenage substance abuse.

1. If you are an adult that is dedicated to the pursuit of learning how to properly prevent teenage substance abuse, it is important to know that the first step to assisting our youth is to learn the symptoms that may indicate that an issue is occurring. There are numerous signs of potential drug and alcohol abuse.

These signs may include social isolation, personality changes, a loss of interest in activities and people that once drew the attention of the teenager, weight loss, a drop in grades, and several other symptoms. You may research these symptoms online, check out books at your local library, purchase books from your local bookstore, and even consult a medical professional that works with youth that suffer from a dependency to various types of substances.

2. The next way to properly prevent teenage substance abuse is to learn as much as you possibly can about the various types of substances that teens find attractive. You should research alcohol, amphetamines, cocaine, crack, crystal meth, and various other types of drugs. You should learn the symptoms associated with each and other vitally important information. By learning about the drugs available today, you can potentially stop an issue that your teen may experience before it becomes an addiction.

3. It is important to take steps in your home that will deter substance abuse. Many teens find over-the-counter cough and cold medications, as well as prescription medications very appealing. They believe since the medications are legal that they do not pose a threat to their health. You can prevent the abuse of medications by keeping any and all that you have in the home locked up.

4. The next step to successfully preventing teenage substance abuse is to ensure that you educate the teenager in your life. They should be taught about the drugs on the street and in the home, and be informed of the mental and physiological dangers that may occur as a result of taking the substances in a recreational manner.

You should set clear guidelines and expectations with the teenager so that they know and completely understand that indulging in recreational drug activity is restricted, and that if it is indulged in, corrective action will be put into place. You could mention limiting their freedom, restricting their dating, or even integrating the use of a drug rehabilitation facility.

5. If you feel as if a teenager is already indulging in recreational drug use, you should seek medical assistance immediately. This is a successful strategy to decrease the possibility that teenage substance abuse will continue. This may be a difficult step, but it is a productive step.

There are many steps to properly preventing teenage substance abuse. If you follow the steps listed here, you will likely deter the teenager in your life from beginning the dangerous cycle of substance abuse.

Oct 4, 2009

We’ve come a long way from the days of “kids will be kids” or perhaps it would be more accurate to say we’ve come a long way since the days when parents were parents. There is an increasing amount of children who are ruling the roost these days. The most frightening aspect of these domineering children is their age. We’re not talking teens or even tweens. Some of these kids are barely of school age. These tiny terrors are wrecking havoc. The question is why are the parents rejecting discipline in favor of outright defiance?

It is a sad state to see parents begging children to behave. Some children are even physically striking back at their parents. Even if parents are willing to tolerate certain unacceptable behavior this is where they need to draw the line. Why are parents refusing to act like parents? In an age where expectant parents read tons of books about parenting and even attend parenting classes they still lack parenting skills. It seems like the more they strive to be better parents the more they come up lacking.

Parenting includes taking on the role of disciplinarian. More parents need to realize that. Disciplining your children doesn’t mean you don’t love them. In fact, it is just the opposite. You love your child but you must realize that children need discipline. Children can’t be allowed to run wild without any guidance. Children need to be disciplined for their own protection. If a child is allowed to play with matches, lighters or around a hot stove the chances are that he’s going to get burnt. If a child is not disciplined for hitting other children the other children may start to hit him back. If a child goes around kicking the family dog eventually the dog may bite him. Children have to be taught that behavior such as this is unacceptable.

Parents often add to behavior problems in children. I’ve heard parents make comments that are completely wrong in situations such as those mentioned above. “Look, he’s no wimp. He knows how to handle himself already,” was the comment one father made when his three-year-old son walked up and pushed another child to the ground for no reason whatsoever. “Isn’t that cute? He’s only two and already he’s got the dog listening to him,” is the comment one mother made when her toddler kicked the dog and then slapped it on the head even though the dog was lying down and not bothering anyone. Actions such as these are not cute nor should they be tolerated let alone encouraged. Maybe the parents themselves need some discipline since their way of thinking seems to be rather juvenile.

Discipline is a necessary part of effective parenting. Parents often feel that their child won’t love them if they discipline the child. But what they don’t realize is that discipline is a form of love. You discipline your child because you love him. Disciplining your child shows that you care. Of course, children don’t see it that way but in time they will. We discipline our children because they are unaware of many dangers that the world holds. They are not yet able to discern the difference between good and bad. They have feelings and emotions that they do not understand and do not know how to express appropriately. It is important that we acknowledge their feelings but we also need to provide them with guidance to be able to properly channel their emotions.

Don’t be afraid to discipline your child. Discipline does not have to mean physical punishment. You can discipline your child by setting rules, providing guidance, letting your child know what is acceptable behavior and what is not.

Oct 2, 2009

Not surprisingly, the bottom line issues for parents are very different than the bottom line issues for the teen.

For the parents, the bottom line issues look something like this:

They see the kid they raised from an infant changing right before their eyes, usually getting more and more out of control. Their concerns can run through a whole range of problems - from slipping grades, bad attitudes and little or no communication all the way to depression, running away or drugs.

The bottom line is that the parents are scared, and they want their nice kid back.

Raising teenagers can be like a day at an amusement park, lots of fun but also full of ups and downs, moments with floors dropping out, twisters, laughs, screams and all. But just as you plan your amusement park agenda, mapping out a basic plan, you can do the same with many top teen issues for the most positive experience possible.

Self-Esteem & Fitting In

The teenage years are a time of internal and external growth, where teens face mixed emotions daily and bodily growth differently in nearly each individual. And a major concern among teenagers is their self-esteem; i.e. focusing on how much they feel accepted, valued and loved by others in light of all this transitional phase in their lives.

You can help by encouraging them to find things they are good at; different subjects in school, sports and other after school activities (chess, crafts, photography, etc.) Offer plenty of praise and go light on the criticism. And help them find plenty of helpful resources along the way; library books, school counselors, coaches, mentors, tutors, etc. Have your teen invite friends over often so you can meet them, too, and leave them to their game / tv room with plenty of snacks and music.

Growth (External / Internal) & Sex

Help your teens value their own appearance by offering compliments and praise for clothing choices, even if it’s simply in a t-shirts color choice. They want to experiment and wear clothing like their piers and like some adults, but do guide them in ethical and moral choices, leaving abusive language phrases off shirts, and making sure private body parts are covered.

As sexual maturity comes into play, also reflected in clothing style choices, make sure to acknowledge this stage and not run from it, especially with seductive clothing and late night outings. Take charge and remind your teen that while it’s great to want to be attractive, sex can and most often does lead to parenting and that’s a very serious issue. Make sure your teens understand your opinion on this area. And if you don’t have one yet, it may be time to get involved and take a stance. Life, lives could be at stake. So don’t leave this topic left hanging because you are uncomfortable. You may be much more uncomfortable if you do nothing.

Keep in mind, there are plenty more teenage issues for parents to deal with, some easy and some not so easy.

Oct 1, 2009

Teenage sexual activity is a major problem confronting the nation and has led to a rising incidence of sexually transmitted diseases (STDs), emotional and psychological injuries, and out-of-wedlock childbearing thus teenage pregnancies and premarital sex occurrences alarm every sector in our society particularly the church and health institutions. Substantial studies had been conducted to support this scenario. A Young Adult Fertility Survey (Yafs) disclosed that males are more into pre-marital sex than females but over the years, young women are catching up with men. The survey covered 20,000 Filipino youths aged 15 to 24 years old across the country. According to the 2002 Young Adult Fertility and Sexuality Study by the University of the Philippines Population Institute (UPPI) and the Demographic Research and Development Foundation, 26 percent of our Filipino youth nationwide, from ages 15 to 25 years old, admitted to having a pre-marital sex experience. What's worse is that 38 percent of our youth are already in a live-in arrangement.

The sexual revolution has ushered in a period where the average adolescent faces tremendous pressures to have sexual experiences of all kinds. Today, Pinoy teens get a higher exposure to sex from the Internet, magazines, TV shows, movies, and other media than decades ago, yet without any corresponding increase in information on how to handle the input. So kids are pretty much left to other kids for opinions and value formation when it comes to sex. Sexual misinformation is, therefore, equally shared in the group. Parents at home and teachers in school feel equally inadequate or uneasy to discuss the topic of sex with youngsters. The problem mounts because the barkada has a more profound influence than parents do, exerts pressure and expects the adolescent to conform to the rest of the them.

In our society, having sex outside marriage or before marriage is not acceptable especially that we are a Christian country where the sanctity of marriage is considered sacred be it civil or church wedding. But still a lot of people, particularly the young ones, were tempted to commit this act, discrediting the belief that sex is only for married couple and virginity is the gift one can give to her husband on the night of their wedding.

"Girls have sex to be loved, while boys love to have sex". This romantic cliché is the most obviously sleazy yet devastatingly lines ever spoken. Men telling women that having sex is just their way of expressing their love, is about as threadbare saw a spider inviting a butterfly into her parlor; while women believe that having sex is their way of proving their love to a man. They gave all in the name of love to establish the truth of reality of their love. However, the question is: what if they are not meant to be? Later on, the women realize that the damage has been done. The guilt sets in and emotion like this has a great effect in their whole life.

The knowledge of pre-marital sex among the youth has been observed to be weak as shown by the increasing rate of unwanted pregnancies, case of abortions, use of contraceptives and the spread of sexually transmitted disease. Teens have the right to know more than the bare facts of menstruation menopause, pregnancies, etc. With the right information, the youth will be more cautious with their sexual activities.

Sexual intercourse in itself is neither morally evil nor good. It is the manner on which it was use that declares its morality. Like most things in life, it has to be done in the proper place, in the proper time and in the proper circumstances. Sexual intercourse should be practiced exclusively by those who are married (opposite sexes, of course) and should always be consensual, practiced in the spirit of love, and should always be in private. This is the only proper way of doing it.

The youth must wait for the right time before engaging in sexual acts, not because of the reason that it is an immoral practice but rather of the fact the risks involved such as abortion, unwanted pregnancy, getting the sexually transmitted diseases, etc. It has also ill effects on their mental, social and psychological being. Nevertheless whatever decision one will make, he/should be ready to face the consequences of their actions.

Unprotected sexual activity in adolescence brings with it the dangers of too early or unwanted pregnancy, induced abortion often in unsafe conditions, STDs, HIV infection and AIDS. In the 1994 YAFSS II, a great number of Filipino youth aged 15-24 had been actively engaged in sexual activity. About 1.8 M boys and 670,000 girls had sexual relations already. On the average, the first sex encounter happened at the age 18. The study also points to signs that girls were forced into sexual relations due to their inability to successfully negotiate refusal of sexual intercourse when not desired and are usually confronted with the threat of abandonment by the partner.

The presence of parents and parental supervision is a key factor that could regulate the spontaneity of sexual activity among young adolescents. Other factors associated with the adolescents early sexual experience are social interactions indexed by the frequency of going out with friends.

To enable adolescents and youth to cope with these challenging world, they should be provided with accurate information on their health concerns; make health services available and accessible to them; build their skills to enable them to deal effectively with the demands and challenges of everyday life and creates a safe and supportive environment that will nurture their growth and development. The influential adults such as parents, health service providers, teachers, legislators and people in the community should also have the skills to deal with adolescent issues and concerns.

To stay away from these harmful effects teenagers must maintain standards and understand their responsibilities. Teens today need to follow the law of chastity. Chastity is "a lifestyle that brings freedom, respect, peace, and even romance - without regret; Chastity frees a couple from the selfish attitudes of using each other as objects, and makes them capable of their love. Chastity is a very difficult lifestyle. Chastity means the successful integration of sexuality within the person and thus the inner unity of man in his bodily and spiritual being" (Catechism of the Catholic Church 2337). This comes to show that chastity needs to be practiced amongst our youth today. Teenagers are prone to premarital sex, and are especially influenced by the media's casual attitude toward it. Teenagers today are bombarded with the image of premarital sex through advertising. You can not watch cable television without seeing people kissing intimately, or even having sex . Premarital sex is suggested everywhere in our society, as seen on billboards, in movies, and in magazines. Perhaps, if teenagers had more confidence, they would not be prone to, and influenced by these artificial advertisements.

There is no better way for teenagers to protect themselves from all of the dangers surrounding sex except to leave sex for marriage. Sexuality in human beings was not designed to just be okay; it was designed to be extremely good! And it is great and wonderful when we use this special gift of God in the way He intended. Sadly, many people do not respect their sexuality as they should. Through immoral sexual behavior they belittle what God intended to be a very special experience.

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